Day 29: Cortez CO -> Eagle CO

Mr Google suggests that the optimum route from Cortez to Eagle involves flogging back up the 491 to Monticello, then north up US-191 until you hit I-70 north of Moab and sit on I-70 the rest of the way.  This is Utter Bobbins.  No, what you have to do is head east to Durango, then take US-550 and US-50 north to the vicinity of Grand Junction and only then get on I-70.  Interesting facts about Durango:

• I was having breakfast in the Super 8 here in 2003 when I heard that Johnny Cash had died
• I bought some boxer shorts from Walmart here in 2010 and, unlike those from Mr Sainsbury's House of Toothy Comestibles, they have not yet fallen apart
• Grizzled veterans of the IHPVA mailing list will recall that prolific poster Wade Nelson lived hereabouts and regaled us with tales of racing the Durango-Silverton narrow-gauge railroad on his recumbent bike

One can only hope that there's some kind of bike path parallel to said railway, because US-550 goes over the Coal Bank and Molas Passes between Durango and Silverton and they both top out somewhere over 10,000 feet in elevation.  I did spot a happy roadie coming down the former this morning; he must've been doing about 150% of the speed limit 👍.

Silverton in the valley, 'neath lofty and SNO-capped peak...

Terrible places to be stuck at temporary traffic lights #28948

After Silverton the 550 goes over Red Mountain Pass, at a whisker over 11,000 feet.  The portion of the route between Silverton and Ouray is sometimes known as the "Million Dollar Highway"; the origins of said nick being shrouded in legend and/or Lie.  It's steep and twisty and has big drops off the side and is lots of fun in a car that isn't an Horrible Honda.

North of Ouray it flattens out and eventually meets parent road US-50 at Montrose, so bizarrely, having down a fair stretch of eastbound US-50 in Nevada on Monday I now find myself travelling westbound on the same road.  This is because the aptly-name Grand Mesa lies between Montrose and the valley of the Mighty Colorado in Grand Junction.  This section, mercifully, is a nice dual cabbageway because coming up behind the convoy of four oversize loads on a two-lane highway would have been grim.

Bypassed the majority of Grand Junction and got onto I-70 just east thereof.  Not far up the road They repurposed the only road as a lay-by:

Mighty Colorado on the left

A while later I-70 hits Glenwood Canyon, which is one of the more bonkers bits of the Interstate Highway System.

I-70 is on the upper bridge; the lower is the slip road from Grizzly Creek Rest Area

At Dotsero I-70 suddenly starts following the Eagle River up to here, because the Mighty Colorado flows through the middle of bugger-all, as you are no doubt aware, Constant Reader, from the opening overs of the 2014 Automatic Diary.  From here 'tis but a short hop to Denver and if BA would pull out their collective finger and let me do the online check-in wossname instead of just stating:

We are experiencing high demand on ba.com at the moment.

why, that'd be just peachy.  Sort it out u muppets!

Day 28: Cedar City UT -> Cortez CO

No, you dunderheid, if you take the scenic route it is not 330 miles, but rather 450.  Which means your not leaving Cedar City until 10 am was the act of a clot.  But I'm here now, so that's OK.  First port of call for any sojourn in Cedar City is east up Cedar Canyon and turn left to Cedar Breaks National Monument.  Because this:

They've built a new visitor centre since I was last here so it's harder to sneak in without paying.  Not that I would do such a thing because the National Park Service has been leading the resistance since 2017.

Continue along UT-14, a brief trip north up US-89 then right onto UT-12.  Which leads mostly to Bryce Canyon National Park and thus gets very empty afterwards.  In "Raw Spirit" the late and much missed Iain Banks wrote extensively of "daft wee roads" and they don't come much dafter than Utah State Highway 12:

View of UT-12 from another bit of UT-12

Later it runs through Capitol Reef National Park and runs headlong into UT-24, which offers more of the same but with the added bonus of a BRIDGE!!1!

The muddy trickle is the Fremont River

Eventually Highway 12 runs headlong into UT-24, which offers more of the same until it reaches Hanksville.  Whereupon 24 wanders off vaguely northwards until it hits I-70 while UT-95 goes east through even yet more of the bonkers rocks for which Utah is justly famous:

and across the Mighty Colorado at Hite Crossing Bridge.  This:

is supposed to be part of Lake Powell but, as any fule can see, that's really more of a river.  While strolling around the bridge I discovered this:

What do you mean, you haven't read Edward Abbey's "The Monkey Wrench Gang"?  Tch!

Cheese Box Butte

I've been trying for years to get a pic of that ^^^^ but there was always someone behind me when I wanted to stop.  Not today.  From just past here you can actually see the Mesa Verde about seventy miles away and just the other side of Cortez, at least until it got hidden behind the rain.

UT-95 stops dead when it reaches US-191 in Blanding.  North for twenty-odd miles to Monticello then left onto US-491 which rolls across a region that look very much as though it should be a long way further north on the prairies instead of 7000' up in the SW corner of Colorado.

Did I mention the rain?

BOGOF...

Finally got here at 19:00.  Thunderstorms all around but stayed dry while fetching the luggage.  Cracking sunset too:

Last full day tomorrow o noes o waily waily.

Day 27: Battle Mountain NV -> Cedar City UT

So.

Farewell then

Battle Mountain

Until next year

Probably.

Mindful of the seven (7) hour drive ahead plus the time zone change, this Unit emerged at hour 07:15 of the clock to be informed by Joyce that we were the last survivors; Larry, Adam, Niklas, Wiebke and Nik having departed to some, or more, point of the compass.  Leisurely breakfast, wrestle Stuffs back into The Luggage, sort out confusion caused by Horseybank plc having changed their credit card from Mastercard to Visa between reserving my room at the Super 8 and actually arriving there, say farewell to Joyce, fill the Horrible Honda^[1] with Petril™ and point its snout southwards on the 305.  The shortest route here is to go on I-80 to Carlin then turn south on NV-278 to Eureka but my recollection of that route was that it:

• was boring, and
• smelled like the back room at the Wol Club

so I took the 305 south to Austin instead.  Amazeballs!  Emily the TwatNav gave up on trying to send me via Carlin before I'd even passed the Battle Mountain landfill!

While the POB's lane-keeping gadget may have been mildly annoying, the HH's is Very Irritating, because if you point the thing down a dead straight road it starts bleating "STEERING REQUIRED".  With an orange blinkenlight.  No, you stupid machine.  Keeping it between the lines is your job.  That's why I pressed the button on the steering wheel.  And due to the architecture of northern Nevada, there are lots of dead straight roads.

Northern Nevada's physical geography is known as "basin and range" and consists of mountains running more or less south-north, separated by broad valleys.  Hence if the road goes parallel to the mountains, or across the valley, it will be mostly stop blinking at me!!1! dead straight.  At Austin I turned left onto US-50, whose Nevada stretch proclaims itself "The Loneliest Road In America".  It mat have a point.  The "basin" bits all look like this:

Basin, Nevada, Monday

While the rangey regions are more this sort of shape:

Range, Nevada, also Monday

Much greener than the area around Battle Mountain too.

Through Austin and Eureka to Ely, home of the Hotel Nevada, which I've been meaning to take a photo of for years:

SCS Software went to the trouble of recreating the Hotel Nevada in American Truck Simulator, trivia fans.

The last proper range lies between Ely and the junction with US-93, over Connors Pass which, at 7700-odd feet, is higher than anything I encountered crossing the Rockies in Montana.  Go figure.

Large black clouds looming as I went south on US-93 and they actually started dropping enough rain for the wipers to be needed shortly before I stopped for more Petril™ in Panaca, having failed to close the gap between "miles to empty" and "miles to destination" sufficiently to get here chiz.

More of the same on NV-319, which turns into UT-56 when you cross the state line.  The Best Western I stayed in the last time I was here in 2019 has turned into a Maverik Petril™ station so I am in the Best Western Plus over the road which is swankier but also more expensive.

Tomorrow there may be Scenery.  Or not, if it rains.

1. The Honda is not actually that Horrible but it's both slower to accelerate in "Sport" mode than the Beemer and drinks noticeably more Petril™, which sucks donkey balls.

Day 26: Battle Mountain NV

A groaning Mr Larrington roused himself from his pit at 08:15.  Praise be!  There is strawberry jam in the breakfast area for the first time this year, instead of the pukey grape jelly that tastes mostly of disappointment.  By the time I got over to the Civic Center 99% of the clearing out was done and the University of Toronto team was hard at work in the parking lot:

The frisbee went thataway ==>

Larry and I took a few more bits'n'bobs over to the storage unit before Toronto self-cat-herded into departure:

Turn left after the overpass and start looking for signs to "Canada" once you reach Indiana

The kitchen has to be cleared out, meaning leftover pizza and salad for a late breakfast.  And ice cream for elevenses, thanks to the Toronto kids.  Larry has designs on these:

Even though he's a millionaire:

Naff-all else going on so I came back to the Super 8 for uploading the Stuffs I didn't do last night.

Late afternoon Joyce and I went to look for the Yellow Brick Road, the north end of which has changed little since 2024, though there's actually some houses now down at the other end.  Plus there's this:

You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows...

Yes, that's a BMW flat-twin being used as a weathervane.

Final dinner at the Wol Club for the last survivors of the event: your humble scribe, Joyce, Larry, Niklas, Wiebke, Adam and Battle Mountain Mike.  Nik declined to join us; Niklas says this is because he subsists entirely on grapefruit and onions.  Back on the road tomorrow; currently looking at the daunting prospect of turning a Several of Teetering Piles of Crap (© CrinklyLion) into two and a bit neatly-packed bags.  And it might be an early-ish start tomorrow because Cedar City UT is:

• about a hundred miles further away than I thought, and
• in a different time zone

Summary of this year's event: not a classic in spite of the Calvin/Ellen record.  Small turnout and many of the machines had technical problems which prevented them from reaching their potential.  But it's always good to link up with the grizzled veterans and new enthusiasts alike, and a special and huge thank-you to the locals from the Battle Mountain Chamber of Commerce, the Lander County Convention & Tourism Authority and the folks in the Civic Center here who have gone the extra mile to promote the event and treat us like royalty instead of scruffy oiks.

Day 25: Battle Mountain NV

I hope you realise, Constant Reader, that I'm missing Robyn Hitchcock playing in St. Leonards On Sea tonight in order to Disseminate Essential Information...

Return to more normal conditions this morning i.e. bloody freezing and almost still conditions.  I say "almost" because the Wind™ teased us all morning by dropping to legal speeds before easing up again almost every time a bike hove into view.  A mixed bag this morning.  Just for a change it was Video Woe that nobbled Eta Prime while 'topher was on the start line with the fairing being fitted.  The team has a replacement monitor but the bike was out for the morning.  Alexis was the only taker for the first heat; Beluga One reaching 52.49 mph but not with legal wind.

Beluga One has been redecorated overnight...

Heat 2 had Calvin and Ellen in Titan and Justin S in WooHoo 2  64.13 for the former, 51.04 for the latter.  Neither run wind-legal chiz.  Calvin said he was pushing hard but the bike just didn't accelerate.  Too cold?

For once Titan ended a run with both wheels still on the deck

WooHoo 2 nearing catch

FFS, Blogger, stop changing the damned font at random.  (FUMMS)

Heat 3 had Adam and Dark Star as the sole starter.  73.94 mph.  Non-legal wind.  Gagh!

Wiebke and Niklas prepping Dark Star

Typhoon was the sole runner in Heat 4, if I've read my scrawl right, with Ethan T aboard.  54.59 with - you guessed it - non-legal wind.

Ethan T in Typhoon
The purple stripe is cool, at least according to Erin

A combination of a launch fail for Titan and MOAR Chain Woe for Typhoon stopped play for Heat 5 but at least it had warmed up sufficiently at the long course start that I could feel my toes again.  The Toronto team hauled the entire front sub-assembly out of Typhoon and threatened it with the old ultra-violence:

Erin gives Typhoon's oily bits a Hard Stare
Purple stripe suspicious colour match for Erin's shorts

Titan at an Improbable Angle

Seems we actually got three bikes down the course in the swiftly-arranged Heat 6; Calvin and Ethan in Titan, and the Justins S and T in WooHoo 2 and Typhoon respectively.  69.26 mph and the first wind-legal run of the morning for Titan; 54.32 for WooHoo 2 and 41.17 for Typhoon.

At the sort of time that normally sees us back in town the circus moved down to the short course start for two more runs.  In the Typhoon corner, Frank.  In the Titan corner, and weighing in at $US 250, the one, the only, Professor Sir Chief Justice Baron Timelord Jun Nogami!  No, they didn't let him drive.

You put your right leg in, your left leg out...

Frank in Typhoon

Calvin and Jun got their steed up to ~ 55 mph in 2 km when the main video screen blanked out.  Somehow a cable got disconnected.  They trundled through at 30.57 mph, faithlessly hogging only the second lot of legal win this morning.  The luckless Frank suffered more Chain Woe in Typhoon and ended his week with a DNS.

Back to the factory for the morning debrief, group photos and clearing of the Civic Center for tonight's awards do.  It was deemed Cruel and Unusual to send Danny Guthrie up the ladder this year, because he's 80.  So the job fell to me.  I hate ladders.

Teams and vehicles.
Come back SeventySeven and your interesting blueness!

Vehicles and riders
L-R: Frank, Ethan T, Justin T, Erin, Christopher, Harrison,
Jaden, Justin S, Adam, Jun, Ellen, Ethan E, Calvin, Alexis

I don't know whether Officer Aten rocked up to bundle some miscreant into the back of his cruiser this year, coz I came back to the Super 8 sharpish to get the group photos uploaded.

One more set of runs starting at 17:20 Pacific.  Hopefully we'll get 9 bike/rider combos down the road with high temperatures, legal winds, new tandem records and upgraded Hats, though alas we'll be without Beluga One as most of the team has to leave town to fly home before proceedings are concluded.  I'll post this now (half past two-ish in the arvo) and update it after tonight's activities.

So after the Awards Dinner I got back to the Super 8, put the kettle on and promptly fell asleep for three hours which is why I'm posting this update Sunday lunchtime.  Saturday afternoon the Wind™ was supposed to drop but it didn't get the memo and there were no wind-legal runs at all.  Justin T in Typhoon was the sole rider in the first heat with 38.97 mph, coasting through timing after the chain fell off.  Again.  In heat 2 Justin S & WooHoo2  fought the Wind™ for 53.39 while Ethan T and Typhoon clocked 44.10, coasting through timing after the chain fell off.  Again.  The event closed with Adam doing 55.82 while not trying.  Titan didn't run because Wind™, leaving Ellen just short of her century, while Eta Prime failed to make the start because of difficulty getting the fairing in place due to repairs after Erin's crash the other day.  We suggested loading her into the bike in the parking lot and carrying bike and rider onto the road, like wot we used to do with Damjan Zabovnik but the message didn't travel from catch to start as fast as Bill's car chiz.

Typhoon & Justin T

Joyce looks for fresh cats to herd

Back to town to get cleaned up and - optionally - don the Posh Frock for the Awards Dinner.  Pizza & divers salads.  Om and, moreover, nom nom nom.  Then actual Awards:

Hats: Ethan T (55), Erin (55), Justin S (50), Justin T (50), Alexis^[•] (50)
Note Posh Frock...

Erin's plan to wear that ^^^^ dress in Eta Prime thwarted on the grounds of practicality rather than for aesthetic reasons.

Some of the teams:

The tattered remnants of Team Hermus

University of Toronto

Cal Poly San Luis Obispo

HPT Falcon, feat. Nik on harmonica

The customary visit from Officer Aten of Whatever The Nevada Highway Patrol Is Called This Week:

Respect mah Authoritah!

Only one speeding ticket issued this year chiz, to Adam, but a fair few for failing to maintain travel lane and one to the unfortunate Frank Fang of Toronto, for "impeding".  Toronto escaped being ticketed for "littering" i.e. letting Stuffs escape from the back of their truck and Bill got away with his 201 mph antics because closed road.

A hardened criminal, yesterday
Frank gets nicked

Trophies (assorted):

Women's single rider: Erin

Men's single rider:

1. Adam
2. Ethan T
3. Justin S

Mixed Multi-rider: Calvin & Ellen

Men's Multi-rider:

1. Calvin & Ethan E
2. Calvin & Jun

Collegiate:

1. University of Toronto
2. Cal Poly San Luis Obispo
3. Team Hermus

Heroes from Battle Mountain and Lander County:

Holly, Maite & Becky

In days of yore George and Carole Leone used to make special awards for Stuffs (various).  Calvin has revived this initiative:

Innovation: Cal Poly SLO for their landing gear

Sportsmanship: Adam Hari

Leadership: Joyce Lem (in Posh Frock)

Joyce's Shiny Thing up close & personal

And a Special Superstar Stiffticket to drone camera pilot Nik Vatin:

Top pointing there from the Lithuanian representative!

• That's not actually Alexis in the photo because most of the Sherbrooke operation had to leave early to catch a flight chiz.